Battling the Unknown

What makes you fearful? Beauty and the Beast going into the Disney vault? Not having enough time to make a Starbucks stop on the way to work? Bungee jumping? A bad phone call from the doctor? I’ve seen the doctor phone call scene portrayed in movies and heard it references in messages at church, but never saw myself at the end of that line, until recently.

I’ve been dealing with some health issues and when various test results came back fuzzy, that infamous doctor’s phone call sent me spinning into a pit of fear. I knew I needed to grab onto the top of that ditch and pull myself out of it, but how? While I clung to the edge with the worst case scenarios pulling at my ankles and God’s promises imminent in the open air, I wish I could have told that frightened girl something. Word Up. My worst enemy was the negative thoughts filling my mind.

As an avid listener of Joyce Meyer, I had remembered hearing one of her podcasts about a battle with her health. During that time, she had a phrase she would often repeat to herself. I remember marveling at the positivity and gusto Joyce had in her phrase and determination to be optimistic. What I didn’t know was that I was going to get my chance to test my positivity in the coming months.

In the midst of diagnostic tests, I was talking to a friend one night about the phrase Joyce Meyer said to herself and how I was frustrated I couldn’t remember the exact words. “Why don’t you think of your own?” she said. I pondered it for a second and with nothing shouting out at me, I kept the idea close at bay.

Not too long after, I had two little words come to mind, not all the creative or all that inspiring, but simple and straight to the point. Word Up. Now people use the word “up” in a lot of phrases.  
Dress up: Put on your best clothes. 
Cheer up: Put on your best smile. 
Freshen up: Put on your best…foundation for your shiny nose in the 1950’s…yea, I don’t think people use that one as much anymore. 
Anyways, the message to me was simple. Put the Word of God in your mind. If I put the Word of God in my mind, I could push all those negative fear ridden thoughts out my ear canal and have them crash on the ground below.

In between some of my tests, I was doing my routine cleaning when “Voice of Truth” by Casting Crowns blasted through my speakers.

But the voice of truth tells me a different story

And the voice of truth says "Do not be afraid!"
And the voice of truth says "This is for My glory"
Out of all the voices calling out to me
I will choose to listen and believe the voice of truth

This Casting Crowns album came out in 2003, and I’d heard the song countless times, but the message stuck that morning. I decided in that moment, that no matter where God was leading me, it would be for His glory.

In Joyce Meyer’s “Power Thoughts”, she gives twelve statements to help readers embrace God’s truth. The sixth power thought is “I trust God completely; there is no need to worry.” This is something I tried to jam in my head and when I felt the worry closing in, I would kick it out with this truth.

For in the day of trouble he will keep me safe in his dwelling; he will hide me in the shelter of his sacred tent and set me high upon a rock.

Psalm 27:5 NIV

Ephesians 6:16

In “The Full Armor of God”, Larry Richards talks about the combat strategies of the Roman army. He writes, “When engaged in close combat with an enemy, the Roman soldier held the shield in front of him. But when an advancing legion was attached with plumbata [weapons], the Romans maintained their tight ranks and lifted their shields over their heads to fashion a roof…Most of the darts hurled by the enemy simply bounced off.” I held this image in my head, mentally putting up my shield of faith against the flaming arrows of fear being hurled at me by the enemy. I envisioned not putting up one shield, but an army of shields so that no matter how many darts were thrown, I would be protected.

In all circumstances take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming darts of the evil one.

Ephesians 6:16 ESV

After grabbing on to God’s truth, I was able to let God gently push me out of that pit filled with worst-case scenario snakes and stand on firmer ground. My last test was an MRI, and the first song to blast through the headphones of that diagnostic machine was “I Am” by Crowder.

There's no space that His love can't reach

There's no place where we can't find peace
There's no end to amazing grace

Take me in with Your arms spread wide
Take me in like an orphan child
Never let go
Never leave my side
 
I am
Holding on to You
I am
Holding on to You
In the middle of the storm
I am holding on
I am

God has a sense of humor and more love for us than we can ever imagine. There’s no place that his love can’t reach, and there’s no place where we can’t find peace. It’s like God was reaching his hand into that tiny tube and saying “It’s ok. I’m here.” The MRI brought encouraging test results and for that I am praising God.

Do I always feel positive and walk around with a Barbie smile plastered on my face? No. I’m only human, but having a toolbox of God’s truths nearby definitely has helped. When I feel myself slipping, I open the box and try to knock some of those precious tools into my head. Even if my heart still feels heavy, getting my head in the right place has helped to get the two in sync.

Joyce Meyer Power Thought 3: I will not live in fear.

God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.
2 Timothy 1:7 NKJV

Your brain is an important body part. Usually when people talk about taking care of it, they evoke gentleness. When you are passed a newborn, what does the mom say? Be careful with the head. This is true with the physical. We should take good care of this vital organ, but when talking about the spiritual I have found I need to be anything but gentle. I need to be forceful in battling the enemy’s lies, mentally kicking, screaming, knocking, whatever it takes to get those lies out and replace them with the truth. So my friend, if you find yourself in a tough situation, don’t tiptoe around the battlefield. Take up that shield of faith. Word up, and fight with everything you’ve got because God hasn’t given you a spirit of fear, but of power!